What Black Women Get to Be

Malcolm X said: “The most disrespected person in America is the Black woman. The most unprotected person in America is the Black woman. The most neglected person in America is the Black woman.” 

Those 30 words uttered in 1962, summarize far too many of our experiences today as Black women in this country. Everywhere we go, we face unprecedented pushback. Everywhere we go, whispers and screams echo that we’re incompetent — no matter our degrees, experiences or accomplishments to the contrary. Everywhere we go, hints, smirks and outright disrespect seem to convey that whatever it is we have, we didn’t earn and don’t deserve. Like saying Vice President Kamala Harris is a “#DEI hire.”

Everywhere Black women go, we have to contend with the misogynoir and lesser mortals’ ideas about who we are and how we’re supposed to act, look, sound, respond, think and feel. We might have to contend with other people’s prejudiced notions about us, but that doesn’t mean it requires us to do anything differently than whatever we choose to do and however we choose to react.

No matter what we do, sometimes the disrespect that seems inherent in our dealings with the world can result in deadly consequences. #SayHerName #SonyaMassey.

After a lifetime of marginalization, I’ve leveled up to unapologetically Blackity Black, and that can mean whatever you think it means. I said what I said with my whole chest because the Iowa Nice, once enculturated within me, is on its last flicker, and I’m not the only one.

We clap back. 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

Harris, the presumptive Democratic nominee, told former president Donald Trump, who was convicted of 34 felonies: “If you’ve got something to say, say it to my face,” about debating her. That’s how we’d say it.

The next time you see Black women in public and your biases flare up because they’re not behaving according to the stereotypes running in your head, consult this cheat sheet for what Black women are allowed to be — which is anything we’d like to be. Your input isn’t necessary.

We are allowed to be:

Angry

Depressed

Aggressive

Attitudinal

Hurt

Confused

Irritable

Loud

Skeptical

In pain

Pregnant

Childless

Defensive

Sick and Tired

Exhausted

Short-tempered

Left tf alone

Supportive

Quiet

Unbothered

Unapologetic

Carefree

Relaxed

At peace

Unparalleled

Understood

Free

The boss

Good

Comical

Confused

Capable

Argumentative

Wealthy

Poor

Kind

Raggedy

Street

Well-dressed

Emotional

In First Class

Natural

Permed

Nappy

Perfectly coiffed

Bitter

Assertive

Intellectual

Meek

Lost

The life of the party

Blessed

Neurodivergent

Political

Joyous

Spiritual

Nurturing

At the top of our game

Selfish

Sweet

Enough

Friendly

Standoffish

Critical

Talented

Thinkers

Respectable

Disrespectful

Ordinary

Mean

Collegiate

Gifted

Protected

Powerful

Admired

Whatever tf we want to be

President.